"And at that point he would work out that it was the sun which caused the seasons and the years....Wouldn't he be a laughing stock? Wouldn't it be said of him that he had come back from his journey to the upper world with his eyesight destroyed, and that it wasn't worth even trying to go up there?" --Plato, Republic, book VII
"[Philosophy begins in wonder], as puppets are amazing to those who have not yet understood how they work....For there is nothing which would surprise a geometer more than if the diagonal of a square became commensurable with the side."
"I will now close my eyes, I will stop my ears, I will turn away my sense from their objects....I will consider them as empty and false....I am a thinking conscious thing, that is, a being who doubts, affirms, denies, knows a few objects, and is ignorant of many."
--Descartes, Discourse on Method
"You are educated stupid and can't compute a time cube." --Dr. Gene Ray, TimeCube.com
Justin Timberlake is the wisest human on Earth. Dr. Gene Ray is a close second, a self-proclaimed doctor of Cubicism, a discipline he founded. I'll refrain from judgements of his moral beliefs about who or what are evil dumbasses. Maybe you're the evil dumbass, maybe me, maybe him, maybe my favorite canary Toodles, I really don't give a damn. Like a bored Vulcan I try to take a step back and look at things logically. I believe all beliefs (including this sentence) are respectively true and valuable. Some believe Starbucks has the best Coffee, and a rare few, Dunkin Donuts. Some think Metallica is the best metal band, and a few, Jesse Mccartney. There are Christians who've turned Satanist then turned back again; at each pole denouncing the other. It seems absurd to favor one belief system over another during the pursuit of objectivity. The existence of so many rivaling systems throughout time seems to make clear that either all or none are true or false, or at the very least, some of them are sort of one or the other.
Quite often unorthodox belief of a minority or individual is either considered insane or genius and nothing in between. This game of pong makes my neck hurt, and reminds me of the freeway example of Douglas Adams:
If we know that a caterpillar often lives to turn into a butterfly, or that a pop star has a 30% chance of turning into a pedophile or wife-beating druggie, why should we be surprised when it happens? If you think a belief is absurd or astounding, then it could easily toggle back and forth. This ping-pong polarization itself is an example of the opposition sustaining the universe that I believe Dr. Ray tries to get at. Instead of the entity of one: that a belief is either absurd or genius, why not say these two exist via opposition: each as a parent; a schizophrenic duality warring with itself. Why not once and for all, just call every single stinking one, crazy-genious, what I'll call crenius.
Dr. Gene Ray's ideas are crenius. He talks about all the negative attention on his theories being like fertilizer. He creniusly sees the polar tug in one direction as paralleling the other. If we really must fight over such things, then we should note that throughout history, there's a perfect inverse relationship when this happens. A stupid idea for swords made out of pulsing glow stick goo might turn out a pretty profitable idea after all, as might a slight religious revision to be nice to your neighbors, and of course, vice versa. I put forth the following axiom that resonates throughout human history:
I may sound like a Cubic advocate by now but I'm really just trying to point something out. I don't know whether Dr. Ray's Time Cube theory will lead to the salvation of the human race, or bring an apocalypse that only Justin Timberlake could then save us from, or translate into a good recipe for cheesecake, and neither do you. I don't know if anybody's a stupid dumbass for not believing or understanding Time Cube, but call me crenius if we're stupid dumbasses when we instantly reject an unothodox view we don't even understand. I'm primarily a comedian, I parody everything under the sun, but as that's been done to its limit to poor Mr. Ray, I think it's time someone actually bothered figuring out what the hell he's talking about, so then if you still disagree, you can at least intelligently claim that Dr. Ray is a stupid dumbass.
Remember Plato's Allegory of the Cave. Plato draws up a timeless example of personal epiphany. A man chained among others inside a cave--who watch shadows flickering on the walls equating them with substance and form, all there is--is led outside, and shown that shadows are cast by light behind an object, and then led back in, and where he calls them stupid dumbasses, and they call him the same right back (Republic, Book VII). In my strivance for balance, I shall bring up another one.
I don't know which category--if either--cubist Dr. Gene Ray's Time Cube theory falls under, but either way, I don't think we can know a darn thing about him unless we understand him. Through no fault of his own (not everyone is born stage ready) he communicates his crenius thoughts like a mute spanish to english translator. He's frequently said he's not a writer or a speaker, and I am, so I figure I'd take a stab at interpretting his ideas. I will admit that a large chunk of my own theses I've posted are eerily similar (I only came across Dr. Ray very recently), but I think that's the only person who would bother to speak for him. If I repeat my own thoughts it will only be in the context that that is what I believe Dr. Ray is trying to say as well. My sole goal is to act as interpreter--and I promise you if I thought (or think, who knows) Dr. Ray an evil dumbass, I would still write the exact same translation.
After that, I'll leave Dr. Ray's moral beliefs about his logical or illogical conclusions to him. But in his defense of his right to have perfectly valid beliefs, I should point out that doesn't just about everyone else on the planet aside from the handful of ambivolent monks that recorded the album "Chant" do the same damn thing? Christians believe half of humanity will burn in hell for all eternity. I sort of take offense to that, and at least a couple other people on the planet sort of do too. When a Christian couple sitting in a cafe sipping a decaf French expresso politely inform me that I'm being EVIL--in an act that in excess could land me to BURN IN HELL for ALL ETERNITY--by sipping the exact same 40% sun-dried decaf French mocha expresso with a cute gay florist from down the street who's better dressed than both of them, I'm very, very inclined to label that person a stupid dumbass, and would ask them to turn off their caps lock (a vehemence intrinsicaly implied in their claims).
On the other hand, maybe there's the following situation. An atheist points to the night sky and tells me, look, look, there isn't a damn thing out there. And I don't see God on Earth. I checked everywhere. Well, Did you survey Alpha Centauri? Because I think it's a few light years ahead exactly where you're pointing. If this person tells me there are no gods or ghosts when that very day I had a three hour discussion with Posiedon himself who came down from the heavens using my scope bottle as a hyperdimensional doorway, who told me all about Zeus's radical political beliefs on the laws allowing the dating of well-dressed florists, I'm again, quite inclined to call this person a stupid dumbass. (As I would be to a psychiatrist who claimed I hallucinated the whole thing, or a friend who told me it was probably the shrooms).
And that's just words. When we really slam our caps lock, we go nuke a continent of evil snotheads because they tried to nuke us evil snotheads first. If you can nuke cities of evil dumbass, then Dr. Ray can damn well call you one to your face. Here forth, if I slip and let a judgement through, it will most likely be that you're all stupid snotheads for not working out once and for all where the hell you want to be. Hence for the course of this paper, I shall humbly declare myself The Most Ambivolent Human to ever approach Time Cube. And if that makes me an advocate of Dr. Gene Gray's Cubism and his rejection of Oneism, well, at least that makes one.
Wikipedia Entry for Time Cube
Gene Ray Interview
Gene Ray Experience Episode 6
Supernova Time Cube
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